Test Drive a Kia for Da Juiceman. Okay!

I came across a tweet about a free Girl Talk concert this Sunday in NYC. When I found out that OJ Da Juiceman would also be performing, I got SUPER excited. I love Da Juiceman. Mainly because of his high pitched “aaay!” and “okay” shouts that can be found in every single one of his songs – play the track below in case you are not familiar. The noise he makes reminds me of a puppy. And I love puppies.

When I found out that I had to test-drive a Kia Soul in order to get into the free show, I was immediately disappointed. I don’t have time to go test drive a car that 1.) I have no interest in buying and 2.) have no money to buy. Kia probably underestimated the number of people who actually live in NYC and purchase/drive cars on this one. They are doing free events across the country, which can be found on the Kia Soul Collective Web site. So maybe some of my public-transportation-restricted readers can take advantage.

Make The Trap Say Aye - Oj Da Juiceman

Java

I walked into my local deli on Friday afternoon to pick up a gallon of water. Normally I just use the Brita but it was a particularly hot day and I knew that Jason and I would be drinking a lot more H20 than normal this weekend.

So I walk into the deli, pick up the jug of Poland Spring and bring it to the counter. Another man was already near the register, and he was opening a bottle of Corona he had just purchased. “Well, it is a hot day and he probably just wants to cool off” I thought, as he begins to drink the sweating bottle of booze right there inside the store. But then he started yelling at the cashier about getting him “his cup” and the “one with the cover.”

Alright, a little road soda for a walk down the sidewalk never hurt anyone, right? So I wasn’t too alarmed as this was going on. The cashier comes over with a small coffee cup and hands it to the man. “NO, the BIG cup!” he responds. “The one they ALWAYS give me. MY cup!”

Interesting. This man seems to doggybag his acohohlic beverages on a fairly consistent basis if he has his “own” cup at the deli on Lexington and 25th street. Maybe he has a drinking problem – it’s a shame, but what are you gonna do?

So the cashier shuffles back to the coffee pot and fetches the large coffee cup and cover for the overbearing patron. The man mutters a quick “thanks guy” and then proceeds to pour the rest of his beer into the cup and then places the cover on for maximum sidewalk drinking capacity.

Except he wasn’t planning to drink this on the sidewalk. What I witnessed next was both deeply disturbing and eye-opening. The man turned to the door, took his cup of “coffee” outside, took his keys out, and proceeded to get into his cab. My mouth dropped open as he drove the yellow cab away.

I’m never riding in a cab where I see the driver with a coffee cup again.

The Most Delicious Awards Ceremony of the Year – The VENDYs

Make sure to vote this week for your favorite NYC vendors in the 5^th annual Vendy Awards. You know, it’s tough…choosing between the Halal cart on 23^rd and 5^th or the Halal cart on 24^th and 6^th, but it is in our patriotic duty to do so.

But seriously, huge tossup this year between the Cupcake Stop (newcomer underdog) and Calexico Cart (an overwhelming fan favorite or shoe-in, if you will – now with their own sit-down joint in Red Hook). Who will you vote for?

Nominations close on Saturday August 1. You can vote for your favorite street meats or public alley pasties here.

Eating Cake, Running Laps, Taking Names.

So my friend Michelle is one of those super-successful, over-achieving, gorgeous, intelligent, funny, perfect girl-next-door types that enjoys tutoring illiterate children and knitting scarves for the homeless in her spare time. She also likes to run 20 miles at 5:00 in the morning before she goes to work for 14 hours as a rising accountant at a major firm.

Naturally, she's running the NYC Marathon this Sunday for charity - Team Continuum, a non-profit that is dedicated to taking immediate care of anyone involved in fighting cancer. As I'm sure that the majority of people out there have had a family member or friend who's been affected by cancer, this is truly a noble cause.

This is why I'm asking you to donate to Michelle's charity run. Instead of dropping $12 on an appletini or $15 on a gourmet cheeseburger this Thursday night, give it to Michelle, who is far more responsible (both fiscally and physically) than you or I!

You can donate directly to her Web site: http://www.teamcontinuum.net/athlete_page.asp?eid=22&uid=82871.

While we all can't eat cake, drink Stoli and run 26.2 like Michelle, we can at least help her along the way. Go L!

Dear Daily Nuzzo

We have a slew of Dear Daily Nuzzo questions today. And by slew, I really mean two. Send your queries and daily gripes by emailing dailynuzzo@gmail.com. Enjoy!

Dear Daily Nuzzo,
I recently hooked up with an ex-flame for use of her air conditioner. For Christ sake, it’s 100 degrees out there! Anyway, I have no real intention of continuing a relationship with her and I also have a semi-relationship with another girl who lives out of town. I don’t want to screw my chances with hot out-of-towner for an air conditioner. But then again, it was a good hook-up and I didn’t wake up in a puddle of my own sweat. What do I do?

Sincerely,
Sweaty in NYC

Dear Sweaty,
Buy an air conditioner. They are $100 at P.C. Richard. It will save you from the always-shameful ex-lover hook-up and you’ll be all set for when that hot out-of-towner comes for a visit. Besides, what kinda girl is going to hook up with a guy who doesn’t own an AC? Well, I mean, I guess if you’re into that sort of thing. As for the AC girl, make sure you tell her that it was a one-time deal and that you feel really terrible for leading her own. However, don't mention anything about how it was all in vain for the 65 degree room temperature.

Dear Daily Nuzzo,
Why are men such chicks lately? The stereotypical female traits are more applicable to men nowadays. This includes cuddling, attention seeking, reinforcement on the status of the relationship, sensitivity, neediness, talking about how you feel and overall girly annoyingness. Is this some sort of trend – like is it all part of being “metro?” What’s the deal with guys being so in touch with their feelings?

Sincerely,
Fed up with she-males

Dear Fed up,
I hear ya sister. Ever since Dr. Phil debuted, guys are more worried about feelings and morality then being a man. My advice to you – don’t date anyone in a major city, where politeness overrules masculinity. Move to Montana and find a cowboy on a dude ranch. He won’t know the definition of ‘emotion’ yet alone how to properly treat a woman. You’ll never have to worry about talking about “feelings” and “the future” again. You’ll just have to learn how to properly skin and cook a bison for dinner.