Jason Giambi has weaned himself off steroids (supposedly) and has grown himself a pretty sick stache. Now a contender in the All Star Game “Final Vote,” where he can earn himself the last available slot on the All Star Team roster, the Yankees organization is pulling out all the tricks to encourage fans to vote. The best albeit most obvious ploy: fake mustaches.
Yankee Stadium will be handing out 20,000 fake mustaches at the game tonight vs. the first-place Devil Rays. This is all part of the “Support the Stache” promotion orchestrated by the Yankees. Ironically, it’s also part of the “I have nothing left to live for, yet alone shave my face in the morning” mission statement of the official Yankees fan club.
Either way, Giambi has my All Star endorsement, along with these kind words from the American Mustache Institute: “Giambi’s significant first-half production as well as his powerful lip fur — indicating great intellect and good looks — make two very compelling reasons for his place on the American League All-Star roster.”
Note - If the phrase “powerful lip fur” is not the coolest thing you’ve ever read, well, then I can only assume that you have no soul, poor reader.