Tuesday, May 20

Chi-Town: Too Much Duck, Not Enough Gun Protection Laws.

Not sure if you’ve heard, but Chicagoans are once again allowed to enjoy the delicacy of foie gras at their local French bistros after a preposterous two year ban on the fatty duck liver.

However, there seems to be a direct correlation between the reemergence of foie gras and dangerous crime in the Windy City. Big Brother, aka Google Maps, caught vivid images of a young man pointing a gun at a child yesterday. And it doesn’t stop there. Google Maps even found a white girl flashing the camera the other day in a Chicago suburb. A white girl! Flashing her boobs! On the street!

So heed the advice of Daily Nuzzo and take it easy on the fatty duck liver Chicago. Just because you can now eat like New Yorkers doesn't mean you have to act like New Yorkers. So put down the guns and ducks and pick up a hot dog instead.

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