Dude, where's my shorts?

The sleepy beach community of Long Beach Township, NJ is cracking down on some serious crime these days. The kind of crime that will shock and alarm small children and saintly mothers. The crime: disrobing, or the act of getting undressed.

Members of the Ocean County township are up in arms about those damn surf hippies getting naked all the time. For those of my readers who are NOT avid surfers, it is custom to wear a wetsuit when surfing in cold-to-mild water temperatures. It’s also custom to change out of your wetsuit before getting back into your car.

So after a long day of shredding, these surfers are supposed to drive home in a salty, stinky suit? This is not rush hour, people. Us beach types like to be comfortable when we drive. Most times we’re not even wearing shoes. Yeah, I said it – no shoes!

Who cares if we use strategically placed towels to “disrobe” and change into a pair of boardshorts? You catch a glimpse of my ass? Consider yourself lucky. I charge most people to see that sort of skin.

NY Times: A Beach Where Discretion Is More Than Just Advised