John Sterling – You have what’s coming to you.

So I got a voice message today from John Sterling, the radio sportscaster for the New York Yankees. He was calling to personally inform me that I’m eligible to purchase tickets to the 2008 All-Star Game, being held this year at Yankee Stadium.

My palms started sweating immediately after listening to this message. Before he even finished talking, I was already furiously typing and clicking away to log into my Yankees account at MLB.com. It took 45 minutes for me to get onto the site. When I got there, no options for All-Start ticket purchase could be found.

So I emailed my season ticket representative over at Yankee stadium – let’s call her Katie Confused – to ask why Mr. Sterling promised me All-Start tickets that he could not deliver on.

This is the email response I received:

Danielle,

The recorded phone message you received this morning from John Sterling, was sent out in error to some of our ticket license plan holders. Please disregard the message. Only full, A and B, license plan holders from 2007 and prior are required to pay an invoice. All other plans, C through flex and new 2008 Full, A and B plan licensees, will be eligible for the All Star Game pre sale. The following schedule outlines the dates and times of the All Star week pre sale. Once again you may disregard the message left this morning by John Sterling. In addition you will soon receive a follow up call from John Sterling reminding you of tomorrow’s pre sale. If you have any further questions please let me know.

Sorry for the confusion!
Katie

So John Sterling is going to call me not once but TWICE to tell me about my chance to purchase tickets? Listen Katie, one facetious message from Mr. Sterling is already too much to handle. Unless I receive a dozen roses and a pair of All-Star tickets for seats along the first-base line tomorrow from Mr. Sterling, I’m going to be pissed. And I’m gonna blog about it. Do you know how many people read dailynuzzo.com? At least 12! Expect your phone line to be ringing off the hook with angry readers

But what most concerns me is that such a huge organization as the Yankees, which has all of my credit card information, is erroneously sending out phone calls to thousands of season-ticket holders. I wouldn’t even expect this kind of behavior from the Coney Island Cyclones, Katie. And that’s not saying much, considering that they host rock, paper, scissor contests on the field after the games and all of the outfielders moonlight as amusement park attendants on non-game days.

You can send the roses to my work address, Katie. And be sure to get extra packets of the flower food. Bitch.