Tuesday, April 1

Earth Today, Mars 2014

Virgin Group and Google are teaming up to start a human colony on Mars in 2014. Yes, Mars, like the planet and not the delicious candy bar. I find it highly suspicious that they sent out a press release today, on April Fools, but then again, it is Google and they can do whatever the hell they want.

According to Larry Page, co-founder of Google, “we feel that ensuring the survival of the human race by helping it colonize a new planet is both a moral good in and of itself and also the most likely method of ensuring the survival of our best – okay, fine, only -- base of web search volume and advertising inventory,” Page added. “So, you know, it's, like, win-win."

Think you’d like to live in Virgle City, where the planet is run by two mammoth media companies? Sounds pretty similar to Earth, now that I think about. Take this somewhat inappropriate survey to find out if you make the cut for Mars. Apparently, I am not cut out for extraterrestrial voyages, due to the fact that I am “distressingly normal” by Google’s standards. If that's not a slap in the face than I don't know what is.

Live on Mars...for free!

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